1. The Balding Show-off
He announces himself with the cataclysmic noise of weights crashing against each other. After 30 seconds he has moved on to another piece of equipment. There is no time to catch breath, nor to take a gulp of water or even wipe his own sweat off the faux-leather covers. Rules mean nothing to him. A comfortable position merely translates to the amount of reps he can complete without boredom setting in.
He goes his own renegade way, stalking the tight spaces as if a tiger on the prowl. Equipment is chosen on a whim and woe betide anyone that happens to interrupt his show. No-one wants to stare yet he loves the attention. The tight, black lycra costume shouts, ‘I am Adonis. Worship me and feel privileged to bear witness to such a perfect physical specimen’. Only, he’s bald and sweating profusely.
2. The Eastern European Model
She’s a temptress. With her long, bleached blonde locks hanging loose onto her sticky back she craves the attention. Gyms are practice rooms, not for mastering the equipment but perfecting her pout. Every move is calculated, equipment is chosen stealthily and based on prime position. Arse facing walk-ins, full reflection in front, whole torso exposed on either sides.
‘Mirror, mirror on the wall, who’s the fairest of them all?’ Such a silly question. Every second glance is eying up the competition and catching whoever is eying up her. With her hands locked on the handlebars she is in her comfort zone as her icy, blue eyes dart around. No-one cares and the mirror fails to respond.